Every line from The Office season 7, episode 13, in script order. First aired January 27, 2011.
-
Oscar
She's stuck on that one thing.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42344
-
Pam
No, it doesn't have to just be cow stuff, right?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42345
-
Andy
Kevin, Jim dropped out of my seminar, and I'm just... I was wondering if you could replace him as my charming warm up guy.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42346
-
Kevin
Andy, I'm no Jim. The only way that I'm Jim is in the movie version when Jim sees what his future would be like if he never met Pam.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42347
-
Andy
Hey, that's crazy talk. I think you're great.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42348
-
Kevin
Then I won't let you down.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42349
-
Kelly
Cake.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42350
-
Ryan
In you go.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42351
-
Andy
Hi, Ryan, you went to business school, right?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42352
-
Ryan
Yup.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42353
-
Andy
I need somebody to talk to this seminar about business.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42354
-
Ryan
And?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42355
-
Andy
Can you do it?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42356
-
Ryan
Okay. I don't... I don't like committing to things just like that.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42357
-
Andy
So no?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42358
-
Ryan
No, I don't like committing to not doing things, either. That's just as big a commitment.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42359
-
Kelly
Oh, baby.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42360
-
Andy
What do I put you down for, bro hombre?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42361
-
Ryan
Yes.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42362
-
Andy
All right!
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42363
-
Ryan
Yes, I'll do it.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42364
-
Andy
Okay, than you so much. It's going to be so awesome.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42365
-
Ryan
And if I flake, I flake.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42366
-
Andy
What?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42367
-
Andy
Kevin, you open it up.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42368
-
Kevin
Yep.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42369
-
Andy
Ryan, you come in with your small biz expertise, right? And then Creed: guest speaker extraordinaire. And then I come in and just close all the sales and stuff. Um, okay, here we go. One, two three!
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42370
-
Kevin
Go.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42371
-
Creed
Creed! Ha!
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42372
-
Andy
Welcome everybody. Awesome to see you guys. My name is Andy Bernard but you can call me The Nard Dog.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42373
-
Older Woman
Hi Nard Dog. I'm Lu Peachem.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42374
-
Andy
Let's get things started, shall we? You guys ready to hear from the Dunder Mifflin business experts? Good. Well, as you can see on your program... first up is a speech called, 'Don't Just Dream it, do it.' Yes! Please give a big hand to Mr. Kevin Malone.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42375
-
Kevin
Yes!
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42376
-
Kevin
There are some people who have charm and some people who don't. Guess which type I am. Charm type.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42377
-
Kevin
Dream... big. Right? So what I want you to do is dream the biggest that you c... an. And then double it!.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42378
-
Andy
Are you okay?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42379
-
Kevin
No. Yes!
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42380
-
Andy
Here...
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42381
-
Kevin
No. I'm fine. Okay, from here now. The first lesson that I'm gonna teach you, right, is about finding success. And the key to finding success is to picture a winner.. Okay, so then, what are you picturing right now, right this second? 'Cause the universe is yours, people. Get out of the way!
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42382
-
Andy
I'm really excited to introduce you guys to Ryan Howard. He has achieved a great deal in the last...
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42383
-
Kelly
But perhaps no achievement is greater than his on-again, off-again girlfriend.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42384
-
Andy
What are you...
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42385
-
Kelly
Who am I? I'm Kelly Kapoor, the business bitch.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42386
-
Kelly
It is important to brand yourself, so I have a couple of things in works. 'The Business Bitch', 'The Diet Bitch', 'The Shopping Bitch', 'The Etiquette Bitch.'
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42387
-
Kelly
I could sit here, and I could tell you the ten secrets of business, and you would have a great time, and you would learn a lot. But who better to tell you than the Yale University adjunct professor in management, Professor Scott Powell, who I have on my Blackberry. It's ringing.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42388
-
Professor Powell
Hey, Kelly Kapoor. What a delicious surprise.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42389
-
Kelly
Profess Powell, you are on speakerphone.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42390
-
Professor Powell
Uh, why?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42391
-
Kelly
Do you think you could tell us the ten secrets of business?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42392
-
Professor Powell
Um, there aren't really ten secrets.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42393
-
Kelly
Come on Scott, please? It's me.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42394
-
Professor Powell
Um, all right. Well, um, I guess know your market would be key. Practice fiscal discipline.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42395
-
Kelly
Mm-hmm.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42396
-
Andy
That brilliant little bitch.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42397
-
Oscar
A little treat for our old friend Gabe. Put that 'q' right there.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42398
-
Erin
Wait. Why?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42399
-
Oscar
Put the 'q' there, sweetie.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42400
-
Pam
I think there's better...
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42401
-
Oscar
Put the 'q' there! Sorry I yelled.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42402
-
Pam
You could have just told us what you were thinking.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42403
-
Oscar
There's no theater in that.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42404
-
Pam
There's no yelling in that, either.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42405
-
Oscar
Well...
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42406
-
Holly
What do you do in your free time?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42407
-
Michael
Practice Olympics.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42408
-
Holly
Mmm. Do you like movies?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42409
-
Michael
I like the musical 'Grease', or as we call it, 'home'.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42410
-
Holly
We have to try this out on somebody.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42411
-
Michael
Hello.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42412
-
Hank Doyle
Look, you want to order something?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42413
-
Michael
She will have a greekaccino.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42414
-
Hank Doyle
I don't know what that is.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42415
-
Michael
It...
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42416
-
Holly
It's a very strong coffee with milk from a goat.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42417
-
Michael
I can't believe-ee. It's a miracle. She can talk!
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42418
-
Holly
No more brain damage.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42419
-
Michael
No more brain damage!
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42420
-
Holly
Ahh!
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42421
-
Holly
I don't know.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42422
-
Andy
Ladies and gentlemen, our special guest speaker will provoke you. He will inspire you. He is... Creed Bratton.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42423
-
Creed
Two eyes, two ears, a chin, a mouth, ten fingers, two nipples. A butt, two kneecaps, a penis. I have just described to you the Loch Ness Monster. And the reward for its capture? All the riches in Scotland. So I have one question: Why are you here?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42424
-
Andy
Okay. All right, ladies and gentlemen, it is now time for the rarest of things, an actual free lunch. There are sandwiches in the back. Certainly help yourselves. We'll meet back up in an hour.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42425
-
Gabe
I picked out our movie. It's called 'Suspiria'. It pushes all the boundaries. All your preconceived notions about what horror can be come crashing down.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42426
-
Erin
When I win...
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42427
-
Gabe
Ooh.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42428
-
Erin
We're gonna watch 'Wall-e', where all the boundaries of color are pushed.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42429
-
Gabe
It is hard to explain why Erin is doing so well today. The only thing I can think is Erin is living out some 'Slumdog Millionaire' scenario, where every word she's playing has a connection to her orphan past. It's possible.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42430
-
Dwight
So what's your crazy business pipe dream?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42431
-
Guy
Well, I started my own golf supply company.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42432
-
Dwight
Really?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42433
-
Guy
It's taken off faster than I expected, so I came here to learn about creating manageable growth.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42434
-
Dwight
Phyllis?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42435
-
Phyllis
Hmm?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42436
-
Dwight
Some of these people are for real.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42437
-
Dwight
Hey, friend. How's it going? Oh, you know what? Let me steep that for you.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42438
-
Andy
Thank you.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42439
-
Dwight
Hey, you know what? Good news. We're back in. Let's go sell some paper, Buddy. Huh?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42440
-
Andy
Really?
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42441
-
Darryl
Ahem!
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42442
-
Andy
Excuse me.
Season 7 · Episode 13 · Line 42443