Dwight

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41017

Jim

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Dwight

Twenty minutes a day Jim, that's all it takes. Twenty minutes a day, all feet, no hands and I'll have the pedi-dexterity of a chimp, and you'll be sitting there like an idiot. Okay. Here we go. Ah, yes.

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Pam

Do you mind?

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Dwight

I'm sorry Pam, allow me to write you an apology letter.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41021

Pam

You don't have to do that.

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Dwight

D-E-A. Oop, backspace. A. Dear.

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Jim

Ahh, Thank you hands. Nothing else in the universe can do what you do.

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Dwight

[lifts cup up with toes]

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Jim

Oh, don't worry about it. Dwight, its okay. You were wrong.

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Dwight

Uhh, aah!

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Jim

Well, A for effort right?

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41028

Dwight

[taps Jim's hand with his foot]

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Hank Doyle

Welcome, start your morning right with a burst of blueberry. Or try plain.

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Andy

What's the occasion?

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Hank Doyle

Dwight said this entry was a waste of space.

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Andy

I would like a muffa du blueberry por favor.

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Hank Doyle

Eight dollars.

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Andy

Eight dollars?

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Dwight

Owning a building is a war between the landlord and the tenant. Not a literal war, unfortunately, but I am using the same tactics. I've surrounded the enemy, and I'm slowly starving them. To save on electricity I've installed a timer and motion sensors on the lights. It's part of my green initiative. And by green, I mean money.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41036

Michael

Mmhmm, China. China.

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Erin

How was the dentist?

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Michael

It was great. China.

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Pam

Are you okay, what's wrong?

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Michael

Everything here was made in China, Pam.

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Andy

Yeah, its where they make stuff.

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Michael

They used to make stuff in America, Andy. But we're falling behind, did you know that? China is a sleeping dragon that is just beginning to stir.

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Erin

Oh, no.

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Michael

Yeah, right here. It is right there. Anybody read the news any more?

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Dwight

China is on the move?

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Michael

I found that in the waiting room at the dentist's office. This kid had the magazine I wanted to read, that's the only one I could reach and I read it and then I read it again.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41047

Michael

My whole life I believed that America was number one, that was the saying. Not America is number two. England is number two. China should be like eight.

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Darryl

Hey Andy.

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Andy

Hey Darryl.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41050

Darryl

You gotta stop texting me so much.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41051

Andy

But I wanted you to know that Michael and I are wearing the same tie today. It's insane.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41052

Darryl

You need to change your standard for what's worthy of a text. Ask yourself is this something Darryl needs to know. The answers almost always no.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41053

Andy

Got it. Then I will call you.

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Darryl

No.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41055

Darryl

There was a time when the only people who texted you were people you wanted to text you. Girls. And they'd all say the same thing. 'I'm coming over baby.' And I would text back 'BTB', bring that booty.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41056

Stanley

Dwight, why is the toilet paper only half a ply?

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41057

Dwight

I'm sorry, isn't that good enough for your anus? Don't get me started on how coddled the modern anus is.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41058

Pam

Umm, Stanley. Maybe you could just unspool a little more each time you need to...

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41059

Stanley

Don't tell me how to do my business.

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Dwight

Stanley, as a fellow Dunder Mifflin employee I feel for you. But, like you, I am completely powerless to the whims of the new building owner.

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Jim

Which is you.

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Dwight

Which is you' is not a sentence.

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Jim

I disagree with.

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Stanley

Are you just gonna sit there, Office Administrator, or are you going to do something?

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Pam

Dwight, can we talk about these cutbacks.

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Dwight

Pam, when I'm sitting at this desk, I'm a salesman. If you wanna talk to the new building owner, you should call Nate and schedule and appointment.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41067

Pam

I'm not going to do that.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41068

Dwight

Well then you're not going to talk to the new building owner. Which is a shame, because I hear he's a very reasonable guy.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41069

Nate

Y'ello.

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Pam

Hi Nate, Its Pam Halpert.

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Nate

Oh, hey Pam.

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Pam

Hey, I would just love to schedule a meeting today with Dwight.

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Nate

Let me put you on hold for just one 'eensy sec.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41074

Pam

Sure.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41075

Dwight

Dwight Schrute. Mhm. Tell her I'm busy. I don't know, make something up.

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Nate

Hey Pam, Dwight's being questioned by the police in connection with a string of dog-nappings that ha...

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41077

Pam

Dwight. Dwight. Can you please tell new building owner that he is screwing over all the people he works with, people he's worked with for years. His friends.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41078

Dwight

You know what Pam? You're right. This isn't just a business. This is a home, and I would much rather see a smile from Kevin than save hundreds on plumbing and electricity.

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Erin

Oh my God.

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Michael

What?

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Erin

According to the internet, the tallest man in the world is Chinese.

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Michael

So much for keeping our secrets up high.

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Erin

What's America gonna do?

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Michael

I know what we're going to do. We're going to put our best minds on it.

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Michael

Everybody stop working. I want you all to imagine a world in which America is not the number one superpower, where forks are irrelevant, and where every man, woman and child is expected to learn how to play the cello. Now open your eyes.

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Angela

You never told us to close them.

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Michael

Welcome to your future.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41088

Phyllis

What do we do? How do we stop this?

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41089

Michael

How do we stop it? With a big idea. That's what America is built on, big ideas. Blue jeans, the Grand Canyon. Whose got one, whose got a big idea?

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41090

Pam

An idea bigger than the Grand Canyon?

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Michael

Yes, indeed. Yes Kevin.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41092

Kevin

An antacid that you only take once a week.

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Michael

Once a week antacid is the idea to beat. Anyone else? Nobody? Okay then we are... yes.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41094

Kevin

Michael! An antacid pill that you take once every six weeks.

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Stanley

Why not just go one for the year?

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Michael

I don't know.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41097

Kevin

It's too big of a pill to swallow.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41098

Michael

Alright.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41099

Erin

What if we all get together and help each other and hire a new guy, and then we all kill him, but first we take out like a hundred thousand dollar life insurance policy. I bet you guys like that idea don't you?

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41100

Erin

I think that's what they're doing to me. I can't prove it, but I wanted to see their faces when I said it. I learned nothing.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41101

Michael

I don't know what the that was.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41102

Dwight

I say we bomb 'em. By 2020, they're gonna be the world's largest economy and they're getting a taste for protein. We'll all starve.

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Phyllis

Yeah, Dwight's right we should drop a bomb.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41104

Michael

No he's not right. We're not. Where would we even drop it, Phyllis? Did you know that in China there are fifty six cities with over a million people? You know how many we have here? Nine.

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Erin

[gasps]

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41106

Oscar

Actually, that's not true. I know the figure you're referring to, and it's a projection of fifteen years from now.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41107

Kevin

Thank God.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41108

Michael

No, no. That is right now.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41109

Oscar

Michael, China's agrarian. Urbanizing fast? You bet 'cha, but still agrarian.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41110

Michael

In terms of land, not population.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41111

Oscar

Come on Michael. You can...

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41112

Michael

No, no you're wrong about this.

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41113

Oscar

Where are you getting this information?

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41114

Michael

I got it from NewYorkTimes.com

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41115

Kevin

Uh oh, getting nervous Oscar?

Season 7 · Episode 10 · Line 41116

"China" Quotes