Every quote from The Office season 6, episode 3, in script order. First aired October 1, 2009.
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Oscar
Exactly!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31584
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Kevin
Totally!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31585
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Oscar
We work just as hard as the sales people. We deserve raises.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31586
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Creed
Yes.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31587
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Angela
Yes. They don't get 'em, if we don't get 'em!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31588
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Meredith
My kid needs shoes! You want to tell him he doesn't get shoes?!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31589
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Kevin
Yeah.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31590
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Dwight
Her kid needs shoes, Jim!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31591
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Meredith
What the hell?!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31592
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Jim
Wow! I'm just gonna rewind and back off a bit, so...
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31593
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Michael
That was good! That was good! Okay, all right. Well, we all know it's hard to be a boss, right? You know what? Look around you. These are your best friends. These are the people who will open their hearts to you. They all have heart-ons for you, and that is a gift. So in terms of gifts, we should be giving each other gifts. Angela, yes, lend Oscar a cup of sugar. This--
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31594
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Angela
What are you talking about Michael?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31595
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Stanley
We just need to hear your plan for our raise.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31596
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Michael
My plan-- a man-- panama.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31597
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Andy
That's not how that goes.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31598
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Meredith
You're not saying anything. At least Jim was being direct...
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31599
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Jim
Thank you, Meredith.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31600
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Meredith
...when he was telling us his dumbass plan.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31601
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Oscar
We would just like to know what's happening. Are we getting a raise, yes or no?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31602
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Michael
Alright! Let me get this clear! Does everybody want a raise? Alright, everyone wants a raise, so what we're going to do is go into here, and we will not come out until we do.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31603
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Oscar
Again, that gives us no information.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31604
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Phyllis
This isn't a game, you know? It's our livelihood!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31605
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Michael
What about a raise based on merit?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31606
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Jim
Rank each person individually?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31607
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Michael
Mm-hmm. Piece of cake. Ryan, obviously the best.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31608
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Jim
Well, obviously. Too bad he's a temp and doesn't count, so let's get started.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31609
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Michael
Are you making a--
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31610
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Jim
Nope. I'm numbering the paper.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31611
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Oscar
Just--
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31612
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Kevin
Yeah, I don't understand how they can even consider giving money to some people and not the rest of us.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31613
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Angela
It's not like we're not gonna see the checks. We're in accounting!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31614
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Meredith
I am so pissed at this company!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31615
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Dwight
And Jim!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31616
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Meredith
Yeah. Who said that?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31617
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Dwight
I think it was Creed.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31618
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Creed
Yep.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31619
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Jim
It's going really well, actually.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31620
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Jim
Each Boston Baked Bean represents half a percent raise. We each got 24 beans, so the idea is, you place the bean on the picture of who you think deserv-- who's that?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31621
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Michael
Toby.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31622
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Jim
He's not a part of this. You know that.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31623
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Michael
Just wanted to draw a picture of him.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31624
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Jim
Okay, your move.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31625
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Michael
Alright! Who to pick? Who to pick?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31626
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Jim
Here we go.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31627
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Michael
I... will skip a turn.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31628
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Jim
Okay, you're gonna still have to play that bean. You know that.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31629
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Michael
I need more time.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31630
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Erin
Wallace sent an e-mail about a meeting next week. He wants you both to respond.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31631
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Dwight
People are starting to notice how terrible Jim is. It's great. Eventually, they'll rise up and revolt. My only hope is that they do it sooner rather than later. If the people here were our founding fathers, the Revolutionary War would have been delayed ten years, because Stanley Washington was napping, and Phyllis Hancock was still signing the declaration, and Kevin Jefferson was distracted by a butterfly.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31632
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Dwight
Come on in. That's right. Come in, feast your eyes. They determine our worth by putting beans upon our faces.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31633
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Oscar
What the hell?!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31634
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Dwight
Things were not this bad when just Michael was manager.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31635
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Michael
Hey, what are you guys doing in here?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31636
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Kevin
What does a bean mean?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31637
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Pam
Why aren't there any beans on this very old, frizzy-haired picture of me?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31638
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Kevin
Michael, what does a bean mean?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31639
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Pam
Jim?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31640
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Jim
I was just trying to be unbiased.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31641
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Kevin
What does a bean mean?!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31642
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Oscar
Someone please explain it to Kevin.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31643
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Meredith
Why can't you? My time is just as valuable as yours.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31644
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Phyllis
Not according to the beans.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31645
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Angela
This is how you make this important decision?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31646
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Andy
There's no way that Stanley gets more beans than me. That is ridiculous. This is how it works.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31647
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Phyllis
It's not so much that I might not get a raise. It's just demeaning!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31648
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Andy
Thank you! That is exactly-- by the way, I would also like a raise.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31649
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Phyllis
Yeah, I would, too.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31650
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Dwight
Are we idiots? What right does Jim have to claim authority, hmm? Is he as good a salesman as I? Is he as matronly as Phyllis? There are moments where we can affect change. For a few seconds every decade, we exist, and these are those seconds! Let us storm his castle! Come on! Tick-- let's get him. Tock-- let's get Jim! Tick-- and drag Jim out of his office! Tock-- take his keys away from him! Tick-- that's a clock! The time is getting very close! It's now or never! What say you?!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31651
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Phyllis
I say no.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31652
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Dwight
No, I mean, what do you say to my plan? Okay.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31653
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Michael
[leaving his office, hurrying to Jim's office]
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31654
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Kevin
What does a bean mean?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31655
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Michael
How you doing?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31656
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Jim
Uh, on a scale of one to ten, I'd say I'm about a four.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31657
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Michael
Oh, what are you usually?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31658
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Jim
Six. You?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31659
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Michael
Usually a ten, but I'm feeling like a zero.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31660
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Jim
I mean, a performance-based raise sounded like a good idea, right?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31661
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Michael
I know, I know.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31662
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Jim
We tried to find the fairest way to do it.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31663
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Michael
Yes, we did.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31664
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Jim
I just-- what?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31665
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Michael
Um, nothing. I just... I used to have to do this part alone, and it was the worst. I have something I would like to give you.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31666
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Phyllis
Michael!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31667
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Kevin
Michael!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31668
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Phyllis
Come on! This isn't fair!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31669
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Jim
Michael's my only friend left in the office. Except Pam... I think. Is she still upset?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31670
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Phyllis
Michael, you cannot just keep avoiding us like this!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31671
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Jim
Thank you.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31672
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Michael
You're welcome.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31673
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Jim
What's in here?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31674
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Michael
Gin.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31675
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Jim
Ooh!
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31676
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Michael
Just pretend we're not here.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31677
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Ryan
Heard you guys are looking for cash for the wedding?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31678
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Pam
Yeah, I mean, if it's all the same for you.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31679
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Ryan
Question for you. Would you guys rather have $100 now, or $5,000 a year from now?
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31680
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Pam
$100 now for sure.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31681
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Ryan
Because you just give me $50 to cover the broker fee, I put in a hundred of my own money as the gift...
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31682
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Pam
Yeah. No, no, I'll um-- the hundred. I'll just take the hundred.
Season 6 · Episode 3 · Quote 31683