Every quote from The Office season 6, episode 2, in script order. First aired September 24, 2009.
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Andy
Oui, Oui, Monsieur. From the Wisconsin region, a nice firm cheddar. Also from the great state of Wisconsin, an aged parmesan. Here you will find a cheddar style spread which has reacted nicely with the air to form a light rind which I think you'll find both challenging and delicious. At that point, I would recommend you take a trip south of the border to the great state of Illinois where you will find this fine Bleu Cheese dressing. If I may be so bold, it's a lot of fun to let the goldfish take a little swim in the bleu cheese. Bon appetit.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31216
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David
Alright, well I should go. Thanks for this. You've given me a lot to think about. Please promise me you won't do anything until we speak.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31217
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Jim
No, I won't. Alright, thanks for giving me your time, I appreciate it.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31218
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David
Thank you Jim.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31219
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David
Erin, is Michael around?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31220
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Erin
I think he's around here...
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31221
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Michael
Hey, hey, you must have walked right past me. How you doin'?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31222
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David
Ah, yeah, could we talk in your office for a second?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31223
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Michael
Yes, definitely.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31224
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Toby
Sounds like a EMDP-40.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31225
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Dwight
Nah, that's a GE. A P40 is much higher pitched.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31226
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Toby
You're into trains?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31227
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Dwight
I have been my whole life.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31228
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Toby
Wow.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31229
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Dwight
I'm rebuilding a turn of the century steam engine in my slaughter house.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31230
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Toby
That's so cool.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31231
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Dwight
Yeah.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31232
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Toby
Wow, I'd love to take a look at that.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31233
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Dwight
Yeah, it's just a run of the mill slaughter house, but sure anytime.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31234
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Toby
Well, you know, 'cause of the trains.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31235
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Dwight
Wa... wa... wait , someone's coming.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31236
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Toby
Uhh, oh boy, oh boy.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31237
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Dwight
Here, get down! He's not using crutches! Get the camera!
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31238
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Toby
Get over there! Get over there!
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31239
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Dwight
Oh, worker's comp, my ass!
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31240
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Toby
I can't believe this. Hey you, ass****!
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31241
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Dwight
Toby...
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31242
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Toby
You gonna eat all that dog food yourself?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31243
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Dwight
Ooohhh... Oh man! You okay?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31244
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Toby
Just keep going.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31245
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Pam
Hey Ryan.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31246
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Ryan
Hey.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31247
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Pam
So, I just wanted to confirm that you're not coming to my wedding.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31248
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Ryan
Yeah, I might stop by.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31249
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Pam
It costs about $75 per person.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31250
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Ryan
Okay, I once had a glass of Cognac that cost $77.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31251
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Pam
Can you just tell me now if you're coming or not?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31252
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Ryan
Yes, I'm coming to your wedding.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31253
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Pam
Okay, Ryan Howard, yes.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31254
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Ryan
Probably, yes.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31255
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Pam
Kelly Kapoor, yes.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31256
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David
Are you sure you're okay with these new responsibilites?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31257
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Michael
Look who you're talking to.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31258
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David
I'm just trying to figure out the best way to utilize everyone's talents.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31259
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Michael
Well I would say that my greatest talent is being the best man, woman, or child, to have ever run this branch, ever.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31260
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David
What about Jim? Do you think Jim is someone who is ready to move into a management position?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31261
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Michael
Permission to speak on the record?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31262
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David
Please do.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31263
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Michael
Jim is like Big Bird. He is tall and yellow and very nice. But would I put him in charge? No, I don't think so. Because Big Bird doesn't make the tough decisions. I... If I was gonna put someone in charge, I would put Burt in charge or I would put one of the real grown-ups in charge, like Maria or Gordon, maybe.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31264
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David
I thought you liked Jim?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31265
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Michael
Very much, Jim is my best friend. But it's his performance report... right here. Now this was written by Toby, who we all know is extremely reliable.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31266
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David
'Constant office distractions, spends way too much time at reception, antagonizes other salesman, not at all what he thinks he is.'
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31267
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Michael
It's not very well written, but you get the gist.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31268
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David
Is there anybody else you think could run the day to day of the branch?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31269
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Michael
I can just continue to run it myself.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31270
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David
Jim had an interesting idea to help you with this extra work load and it involved you being promoted to oversee all northeast sales and then Jim would be promoted to your position.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31271
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Michael
This was Jim's idea?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31272
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David
Mmhmm.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31273
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Michael
Wow. Ummm, well I'd have to talk to my mother and my guy at H and R Block.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31274
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David
Ummm... okay, here's the thing though. The plan doesn't work unless we have someone to replace you. I was hoping... plus we have to worry about Jim, he has another job offer. We may have to replace him.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31275
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Jim
I didn't tell Michael because I thought he'd try to help. Example, he handed out Jello shots at the 23rd mile of the Steamtown marathon.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31276
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David
Jim can you walk me out to my car for a second.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31277
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Jim
Sure.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31278
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Michael
I can't help but feel partially responsible.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31279
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Michael
Little pick me up? Oh those are the best. Little sugar rush.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31280
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Jim
When you were in the office earlier talking to Wallace, did I come up at all?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31281
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Michael
Well we did talk about how handsome you are.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31282
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Jim
Why don't we head in your office to talk?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31283
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Michael
Oh what a week, God. We said... I know there were certain things we said...
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31284
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Jim
Michael, look I'll just be honest with you. Earlier today I spoke with Wallace about a promotion. I actually think that talk went really well. And then after he spoke with you, for some reason it felt like things had changed.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31285
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Michael
Hmmm, that's weird, that's weird... it's kinda weirding me out. Did you know that Lincoln's secretary was named Kennedy.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31286
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Jim
Michael, did you say anything?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31287
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Michael
Tell you what, when you leave this office I am going to call Wallace and I am going to tell him that you should get that promotion.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31288
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Jim
Really?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31289
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Michael
Yes!
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31290
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Jim
You will? Wanna do it right now?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31291
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Michael
Yes.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31292
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Jim
I tried to keep Michael in the dark. I should have known that he can do just as much damage in the dark.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31293
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Dwight
I need to see your pupils. I need to see if they're dilated.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31294
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Toby
If they were dilated...
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31295
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Darryl
Toby! Dwight! Is that them?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31296
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Gwenneth
Definitely.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31297
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Darryl
You come to my house, bust up my trash cans, call my baby sister an ass****, and told her to eat dog food.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31298
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Dwight
We thought that she was you.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31299
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Darryl
Why would you think a lady is me?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31300
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Dwight
Are you... are you serious? Be... cause you look exactly alike. Am I the only one? Are you getting this?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31301
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Toby
No, nah. I don't see it.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31302
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Darryl
Here's what I'm gonna do, I'm calling corporate and I'm filing a complaint against both of you.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31303
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Dwight
Aww, Darryl.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31304
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Darryl
C'mon Gwenneth.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31305
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Gwenneth
Sad.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31306
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David
This is David.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31307
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Michael
Hey David, this is Michael Scott. Michael Scott here.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31308
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David
Yep.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31309
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Michael
Just wanted to talk to you about Jim Halpert. I understand that he did not receive the promotion. And I wanted to see what I could do to nudge you in the right direction.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31310
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David
So, what, you're changing your mind about Jim?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31311
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Michael
Absolutely, not. Like I said before, Jim is fantastic and he deserves this job.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31312
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David
Michael, it seems like you're cutting in and out... This is not what you said earlier.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31313
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Michael
Wha... here's the thing, Jim is the best man for this job, I think you should give it to him.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31314
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David
Well, it doesn't change what you showed me in Jim's file.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31315