Every quote from The Office season 6, episode 2, in script order. First aired September 24, 2009.
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Michael
Yeah?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31116
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Oscar
You wanted to see me?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31117
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Michael
Yes, Oscar come on in. Close the door if you would. Thank you, thanks so much for talking to me.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31118
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Oscar
Yeah sure.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31119
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Michael
I'm going in for a procedure today.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31120
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Oscar
Is everything okay?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31121
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Michael
Yeah, it's routine. I'm just a little bit scared.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31122
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Oscar
I'm sure everything will be fine. What do you? What's the procedure, if you don't mind my asking?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31123
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Michael
It is a colonoscopy.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31124
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Oscar
Okay.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31125
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Michael
In your experience, what should I be expecting in terms of sensation or emotions? Is there anything I can do to make it more pleasurable for me or for Dr. Shaundry?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31126
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Oscar
Oh my God.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31127
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Michael
My main concern, should I have a safe word?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31128
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Oscar
Yeah.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31129
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David Wallace
So Michael, do you think you can give me a run down on the Buffalo clients by Monday?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31130
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Michael
Abso... you know what? I'll do you one better, Sunday, Sunday night.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31131
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David
Okay, I will look at it Monday.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31132
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Michael
Ho, Hol, hold on big guy, I'm gonna put it in the mail Sunday night and you'll get it Weds.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31133
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David
Okay, Jim you wanna hit the conference room?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31134
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Jim
Sure.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31135
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Pam
Hey, Good luck.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31136
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Michael
Oh right, this thing. I remember now. What's this about?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31137
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Jim
Ah, this is just me and David, if that's okay.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31138
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Michael
It's okay with me but he's gonna want me in there.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31139
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David
No, ah it's okay Michael. We got it.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31140
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Michael
Really?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31141
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David
Yeah.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31142
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Michael
Alright, do you mind if it sit this out? I have so much work to do, I feel like I'm gonna blow my brains out.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31143
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David
Okay.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31144
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Michael
Am I worried that Jim and David are having a meeting without me? No, because we are the Three Amigos. And once in awhile one of the Amigos will go off... to the bathroom... while the other two have a secret meeting.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31145
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Michael
Hey let me escort you to your desk.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31146
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Pam
Okay, it's just three or four steps but thank you, thank you.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31147
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Michael
You and Jim are close, huh?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31148
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Pam
Yeah, I think the pregnancy really brought us together.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31149
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Michael
Hey, what do you think he and David are talking about? What do you...
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31150
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Pam
Ummm, I don't know.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31151
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Michael
Well, you said good luck to Jim as he walked in.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31152
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Pam
Did I? Doesn't sound like me, not very superstitious.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31153
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Michael
If you are lying to me right now Pam, your baby is gonna come out a liar. That's how it works. They inherit things through the breast milk.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31154
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Pam
Please don't talk about my breast milk.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31155
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Michael
I just don't want you to lie to me. I don't want you to ever lie to me. Have I ever lied to you?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31156
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Pam
Yeah.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31157
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Michael
I just don't want you to.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31158
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Darryl
I was rushing to fill an order. I put the ladder up to grab a box of three hole from the top shelf. Next thing I know, I'm on the ground and the ladder's on top of me.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31159
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Toby
And that's how you broke your ankle?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31160
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Darryl
Yes.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31161
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Dwight
Hmmm, interesting. How did the ladder end up on top of you, if you fell off of it?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31162
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Darryl
This doesn't concern you man, you need to walk away.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31163
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Dwight
Oh really, I'm sorry I thought this was a free country. I didn't know we were in communist Sweden.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31164
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Darryl
If we were living in Sweden, I wouldn't have to worry about this 'cause we'd have universal healthcare.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31165
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Dwight
Nnnnn, that's not... okay.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31166
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Darryl
Be quiet.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31167
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Dwight
I'm talking about... hmmm.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31168
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Toby
I will send this off to corporate. Make sure you hold on to your medical bills. Feel better.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31169
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Darryl
Thanks T-Man, later. [fist bumps Toby}
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31170
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Dwight
So long Darryl, feel better... He's lying.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31171
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Toby
He has a doctor's note.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31172
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Dwight
Oh? From who, Dr. J? Look, you really need to investigate this. People don't just fall off of ladders.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31173
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Toby
A guy on my street fell off a ladder painting his house. It was on the news.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31174
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Dwight
Since when have you known Darryl to rush to do anything other than to come up here for birthday cake? Y'all having birthday cake?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31175
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Toby
That's not a very good Darryl.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31176
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Dwight
Please... and how many foremen do you know that pull boxes?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31177
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Toby
Hmmm.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31178
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Dwight
It just doesn't add up.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31179
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Toby
Well, we did a little investigation and Dwight had a good point. The ladder didn't reach the top shelf. I don't know if I believe it, but I am a fan of the hardboiled detective novel. I'll punch you in da mush, see.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31180
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Michael
Uh huh, well if he doesn't like it you can tell that SOB that he is fired. Sorry, I'm going into a meeting right now. I will... I love you too. Bye.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31181
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Jim
Who was that?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31182
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Michael
Sorry about that. What'd I miss?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31183
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David
Michael, we would like to continue the rest of this meeting in private, please, if you don't mind.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31184
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Michael
Do not mind! Yes, I do! No, I don't. Yes, I do! No, I don't mind. Catch you guys on the flippity flop. Oh this... call waiting. Yeah, uh huh, well you tell the Mayor he just lost six votes.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31185
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Creed
They've been in there a while.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31186
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Michael
Yeah.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31187
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Creed
Can't be good.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31188
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Michael
Nope.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31189
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Creed
Think they're talking about me?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31190
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Michael
No, I think they're talking about me.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31191
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Creed
Yeah, that makes way more sense. Okay thanks boss.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31192
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Michael
What is Jim telling him? That I can't handle this job? That 's bull crap. That is bull crap. Although, it has been chaotic lately. Corporate shut down the Buffalo branch which left us to absorb all of their clients. I will tell you there has been work everyday. Had to come in on a Saturday. To retrieve... I left my cell phone here.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31193
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Pam
Hey Kelly.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31194
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Kelly
Ugh, so jealous of your boobs.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31195
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Pam
Thank you. Um, listen I just wanted to confirm that you're not coming to the wedding, which is totally understandable and more than fine.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31196
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Kelly
Is Ryan going?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31197
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Pam
I don't know, he hasn't RSVP'd yet.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31198
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Pam
We invited everyone in the office to our wedding. Even though we realized most people wouldn't be able to make the drive to Niagara Falls. Which is why we're having it in Niagara Falls. Then Michael told everyone they could have Friday and Monday off, if they came. So now, people have to decide if they want to come to our wedding or have to work.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31199
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Kelly
Here's the deal. I really want to go but I'm not gonna go if Ryan doesn't go, because it's kind of a waste of time. That came out wrong. It would awesome if you could try to get him to go because I'd really like to be there to support Jim.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31200
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Andy
What can I do for ya Hoss?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31201
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Michael
How are your sales doin'?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31202
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Andy
How are my sales doin'? Busted. My numbers are down a little bit and it's 'cause of the economy. You're not buying it, you're good. Okay the truth is, I have been having trouble focusing lately. I'm in this weird, flirty, nebulous thing with this cousin of mine and it's a total mind effer.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31203
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Phyllis
Again with the cousin.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31204
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Andy
Oh, I'm sorry Phyllis, you explain this email, okay. 'Hey Andy let's go visit grandma and then get drunk together, ha ha.'
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31205
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Michael
Shhh, I'm just trying to figure out what's going on in that room, okay?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31206
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Michael
Wallace had to show up on the one four month period that I'm completely overwhelmed.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31207
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Michael
You know when they say it's so crazy it just might work? Well, I don't believe that. I say go for the air-tight plan and that is why I am having Andy wheel me into the conference room inside a makeshift cheese cart. It is just elegant.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31208
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Michael
Be my eyes.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31209
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Andy
You got it.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31210
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Stanley
What have we here?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31211
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Andy
Oh, just backing up and turning around.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31212
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Kevin
Hey, we're gonna do this...
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31213
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Andy
Dit, dit, dit, dit, it's not for you. Pardon moi, Messieurs. I took the liberty of preparing for you a cheese platter which I will place here on the eastern wall of the conference room.
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31214
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David
Cheese platter?
Season 6 · Episode 2 · Quote 31215