Michael

Oh, yeah. I got a big box, yes I do. I got a big box how 'bout you?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34837

Erin

I got a big box, yes I do. I got a big box how 'bout you?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34838

Oscar

I think you don't know what you're saying.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34839

Michael

It's from 'Sob-ray', our new owner, and it is to Sabre, us. I wonder what's inside. Scissor me.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34840

Michael

Dunder Mifflin was recently bought by an electronics company named Sabre. They stepped in at the 11th hour, and they saved our asses. Although David Wallace said that we were the one branch that was actually working right, so we probably could have saved our own asses. We didn't need them touching our asses.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34841

Michael

Oh! Wow. Awesome. For accounting, a brand new printer. And for the sales staff, a new fax machine. This cord has Creed written all over it. And whoever would like a brand new scanner can come visit it in my office. Thank you.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34842

Dwight

Here we go. Oh! Wow.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34843

Michael

Cool. What next?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34844

Erin

Guys, um, who's Gabe? This note says to put the box aside for Gabe Lewis, who's coming tomorrow?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34845

Michael

Okay, everybody, listen up. I have some bad news. Due to circumstances beyond my control -

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34846

Dwight

Impulsivity and inattention to detail.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34847

Michael

Hey, hey. I have opened a box, which should not have been opened...

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34848

Dwight

Terrible mistake.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34849

Michael

And distributed things which should not have been distributed.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34850

Dwight

Undistributable.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34851

Pam

Well, maybe we can put the box back together.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34852

Dwight

Impossible. He opened it like an ape.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34853

Oscar

I think we can do it.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34854

Pam

Yep, yep.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34855

Oscar

Right? Mm. Did we try printer first? Shredder at an angle -

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34856

Pam

Yep.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34857

Oscar

Fax, cable, then the scanner upside down?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34858

Pam

Yes.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34859

Creed

Have you tried making everything smaller?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34860

Michael

And - Wow. Really nice job. This group of people, when they put their minds together, they can do something great. And I think that you should all be proud of yourselves.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34861

Pam

Oh, Michael.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34862

Michael

Alright, relax. We can do it. We just did it. So we can do this again. Erin, scissor me please.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34863

Pam

No, don't!

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34864

Michael

Thank you. Oh! Got it. Ok.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34865

Michael

Alright, he's on his way up. Okay. Are we ready?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34866

Pam

What do you want us to do?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34867

Michael

Why do I have to explain everything?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34868

Pam

Because we're usually not on the same page.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34869

Michael

Okay.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34870

Gabe

Oh. Okay. And to you.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34871

Michael

Gabe seems tall. Hope we get along. Had a very good thing going with David Wallace. He was a good guy. He was somebody I could trust. Here he is. You can really see that he is ok taking a picture with me. Even though I was there for disciplinary reasons.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34872

Dwight

Welcome. Scranton hot dog from Scranton?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34873

Michael

You know what, Dwight? Let's give him a minute to settle in, shall we? Ok?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34874

Gabe

Um, hi, uh, my name is Gabe Lewis. I am coordinating director for merging regions.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34875

Michael

Hello, Gabe. I am Michael Scott, co-manager. This is my protege, Jim Halpert.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34876

Jim

Co-manager, actually.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34877

Michael

In training.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34878

Jim

Trained. Loving it. Good at it. So...

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34879

Gabe

We are very impressed with this branch and we are so excited about this merger.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34880

Michael

We're very excited too, aren't we guys? Right?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34881

Dwight

So excited.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34882

Michael

We have a little song prepared for you.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34883

Gabe

Um, actually, if you don't mind, I would love to put this on the Sabre website.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34884

Michael

Sabre. Say-ber. Sabre.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34885

Dwight

Oh. Of course.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34886

Michael

Yes, say-ber. Good. Take it away guys.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34887

Andy

Ok.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34888

Andy & Erin

Hopped off the train in Scranton, PA, another cloudy gray afternoon. Jumped in the cab, here you are for the first time, look to the right see the 'Electric City' sign. This is gonna be good day, for Dunder Mifflin and Sob-ray. Sab -

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34889

Michael

Saber.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34890

Andy

Saber. Dunder Mifflin and Saber. So yeah, yeah, yay, yay.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34891

Andy & Erin

Dunder Mifflin is a part of Sob-ray. So yeah, yeah, yay, yay. Dunder Mifflin is a part of Sabre.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34892

Andy

You sure it's saber?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34893

Pam

Hey.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34894

Jim

Thank you. Hey, we should be fine if we leave around 11:20.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34895

Pam

Oh, you mapquested it. It's four blocks away.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34896

Jim

Well, now we won't get lost. Or we could drive. And that takes one minute.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34897

Pam

We found a great local daycare. It's rated really high by all the local parenting websites. But that means it's also really hard to get into.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34898

Jim

Turns out, a lot of parents want the very best for their children. That's weird.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34899

Pam

We're hoping our interview seals the deal.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34900

Jim

But if not, there's always the army. The infantry.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34901

Pam

Okay. Okay. Yeah.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34902

Christian Slater

So you've just been bought by Sabre. You've probably got a lot of questions. Hi. I'm Christian Slater. What's it like to work for Sabre? Let's find out together. Working at Sabre means taking on the challenge of the road that rises to meet you. Sabre is respecting the past, but opening a window to the future. Have you ever tasted a rainbow? At Sabre, you will.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34903

Jo Bennett

You'll find it easy to embrace the Sabre spirit. Welcome. We're very excited to go on this journey with you.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34904

Jim

So you've been shown a nonsensical video. You're probably wondering, 'What's going on?' Well, you're not alone.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34905

Michael

Wow. Really terrific.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34906

Gabe

Most of our business comes from selling printers. So don't think of yourselves as paper salesmen anymore, but as printer salesmen who also sell paper.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34907

Michael

Perfect.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34908

Michael

No. Don't like that.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34909

Gabe

At Sabre, we really encourage honest communication. You should always feel free to express your thoughts, your -

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34910

Meredith

Talk about vacation days!

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34911

Gabe

We have a policy here at Sabre where we are, uh, allowed to take two weeks.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34912

Oscar

But I banked six weeks.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34913

Angela

I already booked a Great Lakes cruise.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34914

Meredith

Hey, who the hell's going through our stuff?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34915

Gabe

Actually, that's Nick. He's your new IT guy. Uh, he's setting up a site blocker. Mostly blocking the inappropriate sites. And then there are the time-wasting sites like Twitter, YouTube. We are blocking those as well.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34916

Michael

Mm, nope. Don't like that.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34917

Gabe

Ok, did everyone get one? With these bottles, we eliminate the need for plastic water bottles, which are the scourge of the environment.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34918

Michael

We'll still get to use the little cups, though, right?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34919

Gabe

Little cups? Like paper or plastic or... ?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34920

Michael

I don't know what they're made of.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34921

Dwight

They're 2 ounce paper cups dipped in plastic. He goes through 20 a day.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34922

Gabe

Ok, well, I bet you can fit 20 little cups of water in your aluminum bottle.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34923

Michael

You know what can't fit in a bottle, are the 20 little trips I take to the cooler, and the 20 little scans I do of everybody to make sure everything's running smoothly. And the 20 little conversations that I have with Stanley.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34924

Stanley

That's ok.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34925

Michael

There is a small part of me that is actually very excited about this new company. But 70 percent of me is water, and the other part, the real part, the part that has feelings and emotions and thoughts and makes decisions and, if I can be crass, makes babies, that part thinks that all of these changes suck ba -

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34926

Michael

Really? You don't have enough water in there? Your stomach?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34927

Toby

Oop.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34928

Michael

What?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34929

Toby

Looks like we kicked it.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34930

Michael

I miss the old Dunder Mifflin. Too much change is not a good thing. Ask the climate.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34931

Michael

I don't want to appear ungrateful for everything Sabre's doing for us.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34932

Gabe

Oh, I don't get that sense at all from you, so...

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34933

Michael

Well, you should have a little. But it's great that you don't, because I am trying to embrace all of these changes, but I'm - I'll be honest, I'm having trouble wrapping my head around a couple of 'em.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34934

Gabe

Which ones?

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34935

Michael

All of them.

Season 6 · Episode 14 · Line 34936

"Sabre" Quotes