Every quote from The Office season 5, episode 7, in script order. First aired November 13, 2008.
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Michael
Did you know that in Morocco it is common to exchange a small gift when meeting somebody for the first time? In Japan you must always commit suicide to avoid embarrassment. In Italy you must always wash your hands after going to the bathroom. This is considered to be polite.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24922
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Jim
Why are you telling us this?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24923
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Michael
I am jetting off on an international business trip.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24924
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Jim
Where are you going?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24925
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Michael
To Can-A-da.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24926
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Jim
Where is it?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24927
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Michael
Canada.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24928
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Jim
Okay.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24929
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Michael
My boss is sending me abroad to do a presentation to an international client and I have always been intrigued by all things international. The women, the pancakes, the man of mystery...
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24930
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Michael
Meredith, I would like you to pretend that you are from Abu Dhabi.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24931
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Meredith
Hello.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24932
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Michael
I am ashamed at your naked face. I must cover it with my jacket. You are now sexy in your culture.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24933
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Kevin
T minus...
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24934
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Jim
Six point five days.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24935
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Creed
One more week.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24936
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Jim
Pam comes back from New York next week and everyone here has just been so excited for me. And involved. And intrusive. And weird.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24937
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Phyllis
On more week.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24938
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Stanley
Heh heh.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24939
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David Wallace
Do you have your passport?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24940
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Michael
I have my passport.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24941
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David Wallace
Got your per diem?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24942
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Michael
I have my per diem. I already know what I am going to spend this on. I am going to buy a sweater.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24943
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David Wallace
Michael, the... that's for your food.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24944
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Michael
Well I'll just... I'll use different money for that.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24945
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David Wallace
I was happy to send Michael on this trip. He's been feeling pretty down since we had to transfer Holly up to New Hampshire. But this little perk really seemed to turn him around. And it's pretty tough to find somebody who wants to go up to Winnipeg mid-November.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24946
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Michael
And business class air, like a five-star hotel in the sky, nothing but the best. Actually better than a five-star hotel 'cause you get a big, cushy seat and you sit in a row of people and to eat, whatever the mind can imagine. I think I am going to have a filet with mushroom sauce.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24947
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David Wallace
Well, I'm just glad to know you're happy because you know I felt bad.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24948
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Michael
Well that is all in the past.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24949
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David Wallace
And in terms of nightlife, when you get there just ask the concierge.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24950
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Michael
They have one of those?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24951
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Michael
Lets do this!
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24952
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Dwight
Wait, why do you need three suitcases?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24953
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Michael
Two are for souvenirs.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24954
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Dwight
Do you have your money belt?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24955
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Michael
I do. It's right here.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24956
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Dwight
No, no, no, no, no. You want to wear that puppy right up on the breastbone like a bra.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24957
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Michael
No, I don't want to wear a bra.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24958
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Dwight
Here, let me help you.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24959
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Michael
Stop it! Stop it!
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24960
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Dwight
Do you want to get robbed in a foreign country? I wash my hands of this.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24961
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Michael
Okay. Where is my translator?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24962
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Andy
Monsieur.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24963
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Michael
There he is.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24964
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Andy
I'm just bidding a bon voyage a La Mon Petit fiancee. Translation: Goodbye my petite fiancee.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24965
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Angela
Be good.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24966
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Andy
I will try.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24967
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Angela
Meaning what?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24968
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Andy
Meaning I will try to get other dudes laid.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24969
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Michael
Yeah baby! That's what I'm talking about. That could be you if you hadn't forgotten French. Where is my numbers man?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24970
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Oscar
Here.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24971
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Michael
There we go. Our town car awaits.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24972
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Meredith
It's just a van.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24973
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Michael
Its not just a van.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24974
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Meredith
Look, I know my way around a van. That is just a van.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24975
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Michael
Dwight, can you get those please?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24976
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Dwight
[sighs and picks up Michael's empty suitcases]
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24977
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Michael
Welcome to Cribs-the business class edition. Check this out. Mimosa.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24978
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Andy
Ah... sweet!
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24979
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Michael
Handed to me as I sat down. This was my hot towel. It is still wet.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24980
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Andy
Michael Gary Scott rolling like a pimp!
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24981
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Michael
Take a sip of that.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24982
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Andy
Mmmhmmm...
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24983
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Michael
That good?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24984
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Andy
Mmmm...
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24985
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Michael
Don't drink all of it. Give some to Oscar.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24986
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Andy
That's really good.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24987
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Oscar
I'm good.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24988
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Michael
You want one of your own? I can hook you up.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24989
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Stewardess
I'm sorry. You'll need to keep moving.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24990
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Michael
Yes, this is Beth. This is my personal valet/flight attendant and she will be helping me this morning.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24991
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Beth
We need to keep the isle clear.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24992
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Michael
Yes...
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24993
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Andy
Oh...
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24994
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Michael
Get back, get back. Come on, get back to the slums.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24995
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Andy
Oh boy.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24996
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Michael
Hey... guys, check it out. My own personal DVD player and 20 movies.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24997
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Oscar
Andy brought one too.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24998
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Andy
Harry and the Henderson's
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 24999
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Michael
Shhhh! Keep it down.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25000
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Oscar
I made egg salad sandwiches. Do you want one?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25001
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Michael
Could you have picked something stinkier to bring on a plane? My God, Oscar. Really? Do you have a bag of baby poop in there too, to share with everybody? No, I will be ordering my own food, thank you very much.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25002
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Michael
Hi.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25003
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Beth
Hi.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25004
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Michael
Um. I'd like to see a menu please.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25005
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Beth
Oh, I'm sorry. There are no meals on flights less than two hours.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25006
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Michael
Oh... okay. Doesn't matter, because I am going to take a nap. I think I am going to use my complimentary blindfold. I will don it... and oh! Look at that. I can't see because I am in a-- GAH!
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25007
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Beth
What would you like to drink?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25008
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Ryan
Just checking out where I'm going to be pretty soon. When Pam gets back. Gonna be close quarters. Gonna be a lot of tension.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25009
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Kelly
For you. I'm with Darryl.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25010
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Ryan
This looks like where I'll probably do my pushups every day.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25011
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Kelly
Is that supposed to impress me?
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25012
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Kelly
No. Not going to happen. He has hurt me too much and too often. And I am in a healthy relationship so I'm not gonna flaunt it and I'm not gonna hurt him, but that door is closed.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25013
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Kelly
What are we doing? This is so wrong.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25014
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Ryan
Yeah... Mmmmm...
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25015
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Michael
This is nice. This is nice. Move in here. Very sweet... ah.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25016
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Oscar
I'll check us in.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25017
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Michael
Alright.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25018
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Andy
Very cool.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25019
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Michael
Very cool.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25020
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Andy
We are going to find out where the action is, my friend.
Season 5 · Episode 7 · Quote 25021