Holly

Michael, there is some serious issues with Meredith.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23283

Michael

Oh...

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23284

Holly

I mean all of you have done things I wouldn't have done myself but Meredith's actions are really over the line.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23285

Michael

Nnyeah. What ya gonna do?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23286

Holly

So, regarding this supplier, approximately how many liaisons have there been?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23287

Meredith

Liaisons, you mean meet-ups? I don't know, once a month for six years. Something like that.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23288

Michael

Meredith, why don't you tell Holly... it's not what she thinks. Nothing unethical happened... and that you just like to sleep around.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23289

Meredith

Am I in trouble here or something?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23290

Michael

No... no, this is just a stupid formality.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23291

Holly

No, it's not a formality. Now, were these, um, meet-ups just personal? Unrelated to business?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23292

Meredith

Nah, I wouldn't have done it if it wasn't for the discount paper. There's not a lot of fruit in those looms.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23293

Michael

Ughh! For the love of God we're trying to help you... stupid bag.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23294

Holly

What I don't understand is... why the steak coupons? I mean, if you were already getting the discounted paper?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23295

Meredith

Well it's funny. Maybe it's a girl thing, but after we did it, and he would give me those coupons, I just felt good about myself. Hey what's going on here? I thought I had immunity?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23296

Holly

Well unfortunately immunity or something being off the record does not really exist in the workplace. I mean I've never heard of anyone who's kept their job after something like this.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23297

Meredith

Well... I'm not quitting.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23298

Jim

Yawn. Four seconds.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23299

Dwight

What are you doing?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23300

Jim

Oh you had said that you don't do anything personal during work time so... I'm just making sure.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23301

Dwight

Oh, so wait a minute, you're going to time me every time I yawn? That's absurd. Really? Oh hey look, monkey knows how to use a stopwatch everybody! He's ti---

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23302

Jim

Personal conversation. Seventeen seconds.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23303

Dwight

There is no way that that was---

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23304

Jim

One second.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23305

Michael

Well, well. Holly... lujah! It's a miracle, you're at your desk.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23306

Holly

It's Mike-raculous.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23307

Michael

Hoo-ooh! Reaching! You'll get there. Anyway, I was giving it some thought, and there's no reason that two attractive, good looking, intelligent, funny, attractive people can't, you know, just... sit down and work this whole Meredith thing out.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23308

Holly

Sounds good.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23309

Michael

Good. Would you care to bang it out over lunch?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23310

Holly

Oh I already bought this...

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23311

Michael

Oh no, no, no. Your food is no good here, my lady. Sorry! You know what? Let's go out! Dunder Mifflin's treat. Um, actually you're not a client... so... we'll just split it? Ethical.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23312

Holly

So, I've gone over corporate policy.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23313

Michael

What do you think? What do you think of this place?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23314

Holly

Oh, it's very nice.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23315

Michael

Istn't it? Yeah, it's kind of... business/romantic. So you're from Des Moines?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23316

Holly

Mmm.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23317

Michael

Wow, that sounds so... warm.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23318

Holly

In Summer.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23319

Michael

Here too. You know what my favorite season is?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23320

Holly

Maybe we should talk about Meredith first.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23321

Michael

Yeah, get the boring stuff out of the way. Autumn was what I was going to say. When the leaves change. It's just, I... I think it is the most contemplative of seasons.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23322

Holly

Ok, so I have gone over this and I have thought about it and I just don't think there is any way I can write a report that doesn't end with her being terminated.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23323

Michael

Wow, terminator, terminator.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23324

Holly

I'm from da future.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23325

Michael

Yeah.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23326

Jim

Hey, Andy.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23327

Andy

Yo.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23328

Jim

By any chance, did you see Battlestar Galactica last night?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23329

Andy

No, I did not. Was that any good?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23330

Jim

Actually not. It was really so-so.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23331

Dwight

Ok.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23332

Jim

I mean I like all the crazy monsters and stuff. You know, like klingons and wookies and all that but... Sorry, was there something you wanted to add, Dwight?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23333

Andy

Is that anything like the original Battlestar Galactica?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23334

Jim

You know, it's weird. It's practically a shot for shot remake.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23335

Andy

Really? Huh, that's cool.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23336

Jim

Story's kinda bland. It's about this guy named Dumbledore Calrissian who needs to return the ring back to Mordor.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23337

Andy

Really? That doesn't sound right.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23338

Michael

I just don't want my employees thinking that their jobs depend on performance. I mean, what sort of place is that to call home? And Meredith needs this job. This is her main source of money.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23339

Holly

Well, that's very sweet but we have to follow the protocol. Those are the rules.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23340

Michael

Ok, new idea. We don't report it at all. We just punish her.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23341

Holly

We punish her?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23342

Michael

Mmhmm, tell her she can't have sex for six months.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23343

Holly

I don't think we could enforce that.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23344

Michael

I don't know. I saw this thing, like a belt with a key.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23345

Holly

A chastity belt.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23346

Michael

No, it's more of a underwear garment that has little spikes like made of, sometimes they are made of metal. You know what I am talking about. You unlock a little door that... down... where you, where you put, where you put the...

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23347

Jim

He has not stopped working for a second. At 12:45 he sneezed while keeping his eyes open, which I always thought was impossible. At 1:32 he peed, and I know that because he did it in an open soda bottle under the desk while filling out expense reports. And on the flip side, I have been so busy watching him that I haven't even started work. It's exhausting, being this vigilant. I'll probably have to go home early today.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23348

Michael

I am just saying that I don't think that you understand what I am saying.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23349

Holly

No, you are saying that we should sweep it under the carpet, accept the discount on supplies, not fire Meredith and pretend like the whole thing never happened.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23350

Michael

Yes.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23351

Holly

What am I saying?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23352

Michael

Well... bleh busted. I don't...

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23353

Holly

I'm saying that her behavior is unethical and a little icky and I don't think I want to work in an environment where that sort of conduct is tolerated.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23354

Michael

Well, you have to tolerate a lot when you are part of a family.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23355

Holly

It's not a family. It's a workplace.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23356

Michael

I will be honest with you. That car ride did not go well and that was not my fault. The only reason I am standing out here right now is because I don't want to take the elevator with her. And I am holding on to her leftovers.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23357

Jim

19 minutes and 48 seconds. What were we doing for 19 minutes and 48 seconds?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23358

Dwight

None of your business.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23359

Jim

So I guess I can assume that was personal.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23360

Dwight

Fine.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23361

Jim

So maybe you're not completely ethical after all.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23362

Dwight

Yes, maybe I'm not.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23363

Holly

It's been a little tense. People are suspicious of me. And my best friend in the office won't even talk to me. Turns out being the morality police does not make you popular. I should know because in middle school I was the hall monitor and the kids used to stuff egg salad in my locker. I was just hoping middle school was over.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23364

Ryan

Kendall from corporate HR is on line one and Holly is on her way in too.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23365

Michael

What's the only thing worse than one HR rep?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23366

Ryan

Two HR reps.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23367

Michael

You get me.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23368

Holly

Can I sit?

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23369

Michael

I don't know. Can you? Kendall, my main man.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23370

Kendall

Listen, Holly, Michael, I just got the report that your branch submitted and there's a lot of stuff about a relationship Meredith is having with..

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23371

Holly

Yes, that came out during the ethics seminar.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23372

Michael

Let the record show that it was during the immunity part of the seminar.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23373

Kendall

Well, I'm not sure these circumstances warrant any action.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23374

Holly

Oh, I think it is pretty clear that it was unethical.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23375

Kendall

Well, from what I can gather it seems like a gray area. Look, to be honest the company is getting a discount at a tough time in our balance sheet and I don't know that the right thing to do for the company is to turn our noses up at that.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23376

Holly

Umm, Kendall, I understand that the discount is good for the company but I'm just not happy about the way we are getting it.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23377

Kendall

I thought it was clear with you, Holly. Your task was to get signatures from the employees showing that they completed the training.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23378

Holly

No, I understand.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23379

Kendall

Every other branch has managed to get this to us so if it's not something you can handle then that's a different discussion.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23380

Holly

No. I can do it.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23381

Kendall

Good.

Season 5 · Episode 2 · Quote 23382

"Business Ethics" Quotes (page 2)