Every line from The Office season 5, episode 11, in script order. First aired January 15, 2009.
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Dwight
And flexible.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26208
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Jim
And!
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26209
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Michael
Really?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26210
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Jim
This shouldn't be coming from his boss. And we should also consider the fact that that man has an anger issue.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26211
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Michael
It's too late.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26212
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Jim
Well it's not too late, because you haven't done anything.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26213
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Michael
I am already walking.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26214
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Dwight
Michael, once this gets out... I don't know how it's going to go down.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26215
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Michael
Okay, what does that mean?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26216
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Dwight
Might get ugly.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26217
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Michael
Jim, this has to get out, so we can all deal with it.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26218
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Jim
But you're leaving...
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26219
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Dwight
Have a good trip.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26220
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Michael
Thanks. Andy?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26221
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Andy
Yeah.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26222
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Michael
Walk with me.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26223
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Andy
Will do, boss-man.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26224
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Michael
Ohh, I do not have much time... car's all the way over there, to tell you what I have to tell you. And just bear in mind when I say... say these things, that... are bad things... that you hear... in your ears... this is something that I, if I were you, that I wouldn't want to hear...
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26225
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Andy
You're not making any sense.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26226
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Michael
Well... no, I'm not. So I... I'm not very articulate today, so I'll just leave it for another time. Another day.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26227
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Andy
All righty.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26228
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Michael
Which will be fine. I am off!
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26229
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Andy
Have a good meeting!
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26230
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Michael
Thank you!
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26231
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Andy
Kick Wallace's ass!
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26232
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Michael
Okay. I will... Dwight and Angela are having an affair, so...
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26233
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Andy
I can't hear you through the glass
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26234
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Michael
Dwight and Angela are having an affair. They've been sleeping together for some time. That was the news. I wanted to let you know.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26235
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Andy
What?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26236
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Michael
All right. See you later. Ahh.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26237
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Andy
Are you serious?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26238
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Michael
Yep.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26239
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Meredith
I knew something bad was gonna happen today.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26240
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Oscar
You said that yesterday.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26241
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Meredith
Yeah, my neighbor got murdered.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26242
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Jim
What are you standing for?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26243
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Dwight
If I'm sitting, I can't disable his neck or his groin.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26244
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Jim
You're not going to do anything to his neck or his groin.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26245
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Dwight
If I'm sitting, I don't have the option to.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26246
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Jim
Dwight, I'm in charge when Michael's gone, and I need you to sit...
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26247
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Andy
I need to talk to you.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26248
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Angela
We can talk right here.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26249
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Andy
I need to talk to you in private.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26250
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Kevin
We're not listening.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26251
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Andy
Let's go to the conference room.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26252
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Andy
Is it true?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26253
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Angela
What have you heard?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26254
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Andy
That you're sleeping with Dwight.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26255
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Angela
That doesn't sound like me.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26256
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Andy
Is it true?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26257
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Angela
Andy, I'm engaged to you. I mean, we just signed off on our wedding flowers. Would I have said yes to formal chrysanthemums if I didn't want to get married? And, we went through all that stuff with our wedding cake...
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26258
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Andy
Just answer the question. Are you sleeping with Dwight?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26259
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Angela
A little bit.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26260
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Andy
How long has it been going on?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26261
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Angela
I don't know. I mean, we were together, and then he killed sprinkles, and then we stopped, and... I don't know exactly when we started up again.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26262
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Andy
Who else knows about it?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26263
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Angela
Michael.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26264
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Andy
Who else?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26265
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Angela
Let me think about it... I, um... there...
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26266
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Andy
Oh God. Come on!
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26267
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David
So listen, Michael, your branch has been doing great lately, and your sales staff is reporting very strong numbers. Out-performing last year, in fact. Um, and I don't know exactly how to put this, but... what are you doing right?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26268
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Michael
Right what?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26269
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David
Utica, Albany, all the other branches are struggling, but your branch is reporting strong numbers. Look, you're not our most traditional guy, but clearly, something you are doing... is right. And I just, I need to get a sense of what that is.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26270
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Michael
David, here it is. My philosophy is basically this. And this is something that I live by. And I always have. And I always will. Don't ever, for any reason, do anything to anyone, for any reason, ever, no matter what. No matter... where. Or who, or who you are with, or, or where you are going, or... or where you've been... ever. For any reason, whatsoever.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26271
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Michael
Sometimes I'll start a sentence, and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way. Like an improv conversation. An improversation.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26272
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Michael
This is going to sound sort of high-maintenance, but could we have it, like, three degrees cooler in here? I always think better when it's cooler.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26273
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David
Here's the thing. Michael is doing something right. And in this economic climate, no method of success can be ignored. It's not really time for executives to start getting judgmental now. It's Hail Mary time.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26274
-
Michael
Hey, what say we order up some pasta?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26275
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David
What say we do.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26276
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Angela
Standard, you know? Nothing fancy.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26277
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Andy
So like, missionary...
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26278
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Angela
I said nothing fancy.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26279
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Andy
Do you love him?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26280
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Angela
I love you.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26281
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Andy
Why should I believe that?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26282
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Angela
Andy, we are at a crossroads here. And we can either give in to what people are saying that we're not good together.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26283
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Andy
Who says that?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26284
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Angela
Or, we can prove them wrong. Let's prove them wrong.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26285
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Andy
Where's Dwight?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26286
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Jim
You okay, man?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26287
-
Andy
No. Not at all, actually. But thanks for asking. Appreciate it. You know what? I'd also like to take this opportunity to thank all of you for lying. To my face. And not telling me what's been going on this entire time.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26288
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Creed
You are welcome.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26289
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Andy
Dwight.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26290
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Dwight
Andy.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26291
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Andy
It's over.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26292
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Dwight
Oh good. She broke up with you.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26293
-
Andy
No. It's over between you two.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26294
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Dwight
Uh, no way. I am not giving up.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26295
-
Andy
You have to.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26296
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Dwight
No I don't.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26297
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Andy
She doesn't love you. She's marrying me.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26298
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Dwight
Well I don't know about that, because she certainly seems to enjoy making lovemaking with me.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26299
-
Andy
Angela Bernard.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26300
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Dwight
Will never be her name.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26301
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Andy
It will be her name. And you will have to call her that!
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26302
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Dwight
I don't think so.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26303
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Jim
Hey guys, why don't we, uh, just cool off a bit?
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26304
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Andy
I'm telling you to back down.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26305
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Dwight
And I'm telling you that I will never back down.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26306
-
Andy
Then I'll make you.
Season 5 · Episode 11 · Line 26307