Every line from The Office season 3, episode 4, in script order. First aired October 12, 2006.
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Michael
Hey Ryan, can I get you a pencil from the warehouse?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10288
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Ryan
Uh, no thanks, I'm good.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10289
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Michael
Oh, it's okay, I'm going down.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10290
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Ryan
Um... Yeah, absolutely.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10291
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Michael
All right, I'll be right back.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10292
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Dwight
Whoo!
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10293
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Michael
There you go.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10294
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Dwight
Awesome!
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10295
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Ryan
Thank you.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10296
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Michael
You're welcome.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10297
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Dwight
Michael, can you get me a pen from down in the warehouse?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10298
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Michael
Don't mind if I do. See you in a minute.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10299
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Dwight
Okay. Whoo!
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10300
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Michael
There you go, fresh from the warehouse.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10301
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Pam
Hey Michael, would you get me some coffee from the warehouse?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10302
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Michael
There's coffee in the kitchen, Pam.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10303
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Pam
But the warehouse coffee tastes SO much better.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10304
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Ryan and others
Yeah. Yes, it's better. It's great.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10305
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Michael
All right. Okay.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10306
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Michael
I am like Bette Midler in For the Boys. Gotta keep the troops entertained.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10307
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Pam
With cream and sugar?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10308
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Michael
All right.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10309
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Jan
So, I wanted to let you know that we lost Ed Truck.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10310
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Michael
Oookay. Let me see if I have his cell. Is this the only reason you are calling, Jan? Or does somebody miss me?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10311
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Jan
Michael, Ed died over the weekend.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10312
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Michael
Oh, wow.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10313
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Michael
Attention, everybody. I just received a call from corporate with some news they felt that I should know first. My old boss Ed Truck has died.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10314
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Kelly
Oh, Michael, that's such terrible news! You must feel so sad.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10315
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Michael
Yes, I am. It's very sad. Because he was my boss.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10316
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Phyllis
That's a shame. Ed was a good guy.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10317
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Michael
That's right, you worked with him. So did Creed. Well, I'll be in my office in case anybody wants to drop by. Cheer me up.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10318
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Michael
So did you hear the news?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10319
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Pam
The news that you just announced? That Ed died?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10320
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Michael
Yeah.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10321
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Pam
Is there anything I can do?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10322
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Michael
Oh, gosh, what can anybody do, really? It's... pssssh... . He was almost 70. Circle of life.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10323
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Pam
Yeah.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10324
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Michael
[holds out arms to Pam]
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10325
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Pam
Oh. Okay.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10326
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Michael
Yeah. Mmmmmm.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10327
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Pam
Okay.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10328
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Josh
What's going on with Fairfield County schools? Karen, did you generate that price list?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10329
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Karen
Um, shoot. Uh, I will. Sorry.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10330
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Josh
Okay, just get it done. Jim, will you make sure?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10331
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Jim
Oh yeah, definitely.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10332
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Andy
Suck up! Josh, did you hear what I said?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10333
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Josh
Thank you, everyone.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10334
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Karen
Dammit.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10335
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Jim
What's up?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10336
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Karen
Uh, nothing. They're just out of Herr's chips.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10337
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Jim
Oh.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10338
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Karen
But don't worry about it. My snack food doesn't fall under the umbrella of your authority.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10339
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Jim
Mmm, that's where you're wrong. I'm your project supervisor today, and I have just decided that we're not doing anything until you get the chips that you require. So, I think we should go get some. Now, please.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10340
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Creed
It's a real shame about Ed, huh?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10341
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Michael
Yeah. Must really have you thinkin'.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10342
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Creed
About what?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10343
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Michael
The older you get, the bigger the chance is you're gonna die. You knew that.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10344
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Creed
Ed was decapitated.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10345
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Michael
What?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10346
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Dwight
Really?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10347
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Creed
He was drunk as a skunk, he was flying down Route 6. He slides under an 18 wheeler. Pop. It snaps right off.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10348
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Michael
Oh my God.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10349
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Dwight
That is the way to go. Instant death. Very smart.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10350
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Creed
You know a human can go on living for several hours after being decapitated.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10351
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Dwight
You're thinking of a chicken.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10352
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Creed
What did I say?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10353
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Michael
That is just not the way a Dunder Mifflin manager should go, I'm sorry. Alone, out of the blue, and not even have his own head to comfort him.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10354
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Michael
So, I'm not exactly sure how to say this...
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10355
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Dwight
Ed was decapitated.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10356
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Michael
What are you doing?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10357
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Dwight
You said you didn't know how to say it.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10358
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Michael
I didn't... he was driving on the road and he went under a truck. And that's when his head was separated from the rest of him. And I will let you know more as soon as I find out.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10359
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Dwight
Hey.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10360
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Angela
Hi.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10361
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Dwight
If my head ever comes off, I would like you to put it on ice.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10362
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Angela
I do not wanna talk about this.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10363
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Dwight
When I die, I wanna be frozen. And if they have to freeze me in pieces, so be it. I will wake up stronger than ever because I will have used that time to figure out exactly why I died and what moves I could have used to defend myself better now that I know what hold he had me in.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10364
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Michael
I don't understand. We have a day honoring Martin Luther King, but he didn't even work here.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10365
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Jan
I understand how you feel, Michael. I really do. So, would it be helpful to give everyone the day off?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10366
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Michael
You really don't get it, do you? You don't understand these people. That is the last thing that they would want is a day off.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10367
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Jan
Well, what would you suggest?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10368
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Michael
A statue.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10369
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Jan
Of Ed?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10370
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Michael
Yeah.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10371
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Jan
I'm not sure that's realistic.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10372
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Michael
Well, I think it would be very realistic, it would look just like him.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10373
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Jan
No, that's not---
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10374
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Michael
We could have his eyes light up, we could have his arms move...
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10375
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Dwight
That is not a statue, that is a robot.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10376
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Michael
I think that is a great way to honor Ed.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10377
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Dwight
And how big do you want this robot?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10378
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Michael
Life-size.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10379
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Dwight
Mm, no. Better make it two-thirds. Easier to stop if it turns on us.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10380
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Jan
What the hell are you two talking about?
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10381
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Michael
Well, we are talking about how to properly honor a man who gave his life as regional manager of this company, Jan.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10382
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Jan
You know what, Michael? I've really tried with you today...
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10383
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Michael
Mm hm.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10384
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Jan
...and I have to get back to work.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10385
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Michael
Oh do you? You know who wished they could get back to work is Ed Truck.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10386
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Jan
So call me when you feel like having a real conversation.
Season 3 · Episode 4 · Line 10387