Every line from The Office season 8, episode 8, in script order. First aired November 17, 2011.
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Gabe
The Sabre Code of Conduct outlines the governing principles key to establishing and maintaining trust with our employees, clients-
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47830
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Kelly
Oh my God, kill me!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47831
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Andy
Hey! All right, obviously we all want to die but we have to get through this. So, Gabe go ahead. It's okay.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47832
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Gabe
Oh, is it okay with you? Because if it's not, you work for me, so... Comply with all applicable laws, regulations, policies and contracts governing our business. Be honest, fair-
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47833
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Pam
I'm gonna do it.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47834
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Gabe
And trustworthy in all your business activities and relationships. Treat one another-
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47835
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Pam
Oh! I'm going into labor! Oh my goodness!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47836
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Jim
Oh okay, she's going into labor. Make way, everybody!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47837
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Pam
I know it's wrong to fake going into labor just to get out of things, but sometimes it's necessary.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47838
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Pam
[after Angela gives her a stack of files]: I'm going into labor!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47839
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Phyllis
Or should I have corndogs. I mean-
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47840
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Pam
I'm going into labor!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47841
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Ryan
Okay, three reasons you are wrong about True Blood. Number one-
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47842
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Pam
I'm going into labor.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47843
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Pam
Here we go!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47844
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Andy
Hey guys, uh, can't keep saying you're going into labor. Everyone knows you're full of it.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47845
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Kelly
Yeah.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47846
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Oscar
It's not fair, you guys.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47847
-
Kelly
Pitiful.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47848
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Meredith
It's stupid.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47849
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Andy
Never cry wolf.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47850
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Jim
Okay.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47851
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Pam
Okay.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47852
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Erin
Oh.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47853
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Pam
Oh! Oh!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47854
-
Everyone
Oh! Oh my goodness!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47855
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Jim
Oh my God!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47856
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Pam
I'm really in labor! This is happening!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47857
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Jim
Okay guys, here we go! We'll see you!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47858
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Pam
Oh!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47859
-
Jim
How do you feel?
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47860
-
Erin
Drive carefully!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47861
-
Oscar
Good luck!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47862
-
Everyone
Goodbye! Good luck!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47863
-
Pam
False alarm.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47864
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Andy
What?! They took another client from us? Okay, bye. Man! Business is war! Customers, clients- it's like a war out there.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47865
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Andy
I am a leader. But you can only inspire people so much in a place like this. So today I'm turning the inspire-factor up to ten with a little help from my friend America's bloodiest battle.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47866
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Andy
Why even read business books? We should be studying war. Going to places like Gettysburg. Where is that?
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47867
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Erin
It's right here in PA.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47868
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Andy
Well we should take a fieldtrip there. I mean, that would be so cool. I wonder if that bus downstairs is-
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47869
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Angela
Okay, Andy, we get it. It's a trip to Gettysburg.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47870
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Andy
That sounds super inspiring! I'm in!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47871
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Dwight
Gettysburg? Hmm. Could be interesting. Second-most northern battle in the Civil War.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47872
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Oscar
Actually it is the northernmost.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47873
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Dwight
Ha!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47874
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Dwight
The Civil War history industry has conveniently forgotten about the battle of Schrute Farms. Whatever. I'm over it. It's just grossly irresponsible.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47875
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Andy
Charge!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47876
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Phyllis
Well, this could be fun. I-
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47877
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Andy
Yeah, well, the bus has free wifi and I made special low-sugar lunches for everyone. And is anyone kosher or halal?
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47878
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Ryan
What's the halal option?
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47879
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Andy
Dates, tabbouleh, and a bagel with cream cheese.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47880
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Ryan
Out.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47881
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Andy
You know, it's the same as the kosher option. There's a lesson in there. I mean, I can't force you to go. You're not my slaves. Thanks to Gettysburg. But... who's coming with me?
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47882
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Erin
I'm in.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47883
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Phyllis
I'm in too.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47884
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Dwight
Guess I'm a sucker for historical fiction.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47885
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Andy
Anyone who's not going, you're dead to me. You're uninvited. I don't want you to come. But, FYI, there will be leftover turkey and pesto sammies in the fridge.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47886
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Kevin
Yes!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47887
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Andy
One for you.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47888
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Erin
Cool. Thanks.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47889
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Andy
And one for you.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47890
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Jim
Cool. Thanks.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47891
-
Andy
And- oh. You missed your head. There you go. Phyllis, think fast!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47892
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Andy
All right, guys, a little foreplay before we do it. Fans of Ken Burns' Jazz will most certainly enjoy Civil War.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47893
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Darryl
You know, I just got Limitless on my iPad. I bet I could get it on the TV.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47894
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Phyllis
Ooh. Isn't that the one where the guy becomes limitless?
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47895
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Andy
It's just not appropri- I mean, if we were going to visit Bradley Cooper's birthplace, I'd be the first one suggesting it. I'd be rooting for it.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47896
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Everyone
Limitless! Limitless! Limitless! Limitless!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47897
-
Andy
All right, all right, all right.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47898
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Kevin
Not food and stuff.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47899
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Pam
Here. Like it?
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47900
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Kevin
Oh, if you buy the picnic table then you've got to get the fire pit.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47901
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Pam
I can't get a fire pit. I have two babies.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47902
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Kevin
The fire pit is a no-brainer.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47903
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Robert
Oh, hi there.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47904
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Pam
Plants and- hi, Robert! Hey, um, how are you doing? Good to see you again.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47905
-
Robert
Where is everyone? Where is Andy?
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47906
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Kelly
Andy took some of the other people on a corporate retreat to Gettysburg.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47907
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Robert
Well, I was hoping to talk out some ideas with Andy. But what we have here... is perhaps better. By not going on the trip, you've shown you're the free-thinkers of the office.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47908
-
Ryan
Robert, you got your sheep and you got your black sheep, and I'm not even a sheep. I'm on the freaking moon.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47909
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Robert
So, here what we can do. Game changers- changes to the game such that the game can never be played the same way again. Everyone, brainstorm some innovations. Don't be afraid to get weird with it. Meredith! Excited!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47910
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Kevin
Okay.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47911
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Andy
You guys...
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47912
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Darryl
J-j-j-ju...
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47913
-
Andy
Get excited!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47914
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Darryl
Shh! Movie's almost over.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47915
-
Andy
All right! We're here. Limitless can wait.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47916
-
Gabe
Fun fact. In France, they call Limitless 'The Man with Many Capabilities.'
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47917
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Andy
Woo-hoo! Ladies and gentlemen the eighteen hundreds await you. We can watch Limitless on the way back.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47918
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Darryl
I got Source Code on the way back.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47919
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Everyone
Ooh! All right!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47920
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Andy
Woo!
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47921
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Andy
Whoa, where you going?
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47922
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Jim
Visitor center. Gonna grab a map for the memorials, right?
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47923
-
Andy
Yeah, we're not going to the visitor center. We're not tourists.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47924
-
Jim
No, of course we're not tourists. We're just people that aren't from here who are taking a tour.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47925
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Phyllis
Yeah, sign says 'Begin tour here.'
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47926
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Andy
Unless you're going on the very specially-created and meticulously-researched Andy Bernard tour.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47927
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Andy
After Chancellorsville, Lee brought his army up the Shenandoah Valley, right through here! They stopped in this field for a picnic, which they called lunch.
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47928
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Erin
Yeah, but I'm confused...
Season 8 · Episode 8 · Line 47929